“Nice Hair/Legs/Hygiene” - How to Flirt By Using Stereotypes

israeli-woman-kicks-man-in-balls.jpg

I found myself doing this at the Publix with a successful kick-in-the-balls rate of 68%. But, flirting with women is made easier once you compliment them on their stereotypical insecurities. Do this, and I guarantee you her Mexican Uncles won’t sell you to the Colombians.

If she is Black: Compliment her on their hair and skin complexion.

If she is Asian: Her eyes.

If she is French: Her hygiene.

If she is a Scouse: Her moral convictions.

If she is English: Her teeth.

If she is Irish: Her liver.

If she is Indian: Her breath.

If she is Puerto Rican: Her lack of arrests.

If she is Thai: Her lack of penis.

If she is Filipino: Her lack of stolen goods.

If She is Greek: Her leg hair.

If she is from Alabama: Her lack of incestual relationships and lynching involvements.

If she is a Southern Christian Gal: Her “Virginity.”

If she is Russian: Her having bigger testicles than you.

If she is Jewish: Her nose and tolerance to Palestinians.

If she is Middle Eastern: Her freedom.

If she is German: Her sense of humor.

If she is Chinese: Her being easily identifiable in a crowd of other Chinese.

If she is a Feminist: Her rational thought and tolerance towards men.

If she is a Ghetto Black American: Her baby daddies.

If she is a Hollywood Actress Supporting Social Movements: Her sincerity.

If she is a Wife of Trump: Both her mining for precious metals skills and her ability to act in bed.

If she is From Florida: Her trailer in the woods chemistry skills.

If she is a Suburban Mom: Her sobriety.

If she is a Cat Person: Her apartment's smell.

If she is a Republican: Her ability to formulate rational thoughts with proven facts.

If she is a Democrat: Her ability to shut the fuck up.

If she is a Vegan: Her ability to shut the fuck up about being Vegan.

If she is a Lesbian: Her taste in women or her taste in white wife-beaters.

If she is Trans/Pan/Poly/Mono/Gyno Sexual: Her Sanity.

If she is a White American: Her Personality.